November 17, 2017 · 7:52 am

‘Larry Otter’ Lands Blacktip Island Author In Legal Trouble

Larry Otter

An illustration from the first of local author Corrie Anders’ ‘Larry Otter’ series of young adult novels, now subject of a lawsuit claiming copyright infringement. (illustration by A. E. Brehm)

A Blacktip Island author Wednesday was ordered to pay $1 million and stop all sales of her popular ‘Larry Otter’ fantasy novels for young adults due to alleged copyright infringement.

“They’re bagging on it for being a Harry Potter rip off, but it’s totally different,” author Corrie Anders said. “Larry’s a young, orphaned sea otter trying to fit in with a school of fish on Snogmorts Reef, not some sorcerer-in-training.

“Sure, Larry has a zig-zag scar on his rear flipper, but it’s from a shark attack. That’s where the similarity ends,” Anders said. “And the only magic is in the hearts of my readers.”

The series, which includes ‘Larry Otter and the Sea Urchin Stone,’ ‘Larry Otter and the Chamber of Smelt,’ ‘Larry Otter and the Prisoner of Lorenzini,’ and ‘Larry Otter and the Goblet of Kelp,’ were popular sellers in Caribbean book stores until the lawsuit stopped all sales.

“We’re fighting this nonsense tooth and nail,” said Anders’ attorney Bob Skulkin. “There’s also a cease-and-desist order on any in-progress novels. We’ve filed a counter-suit to shut that crap down.

“And $1 million? Good luck with that,” Skulkin said. “Corrie’s day job’s bartending. They’re asking for blood from a stone.”

Local ‘Larry’ fans were shocked by the news.

“The kids love Larry’s adventures,” Sally Port said. “We read a chapter before bed every night. Our youngest got the reading bug with the series.

“I don’t see what some big publishing house has to gain, taking these stories away from little children,” Port added.

Others echoed that sentiment.

“These books are a much more positive influence than those horrible Harry Potter books,” Christa Goby said. “Larry’s adventures have the kiddos out learning to swim and hunting sea urchins. Harry had them waving sticks at each other and believing in witches and magic spells and I don’t know what all.”

The Blacktip Island Writer’s Guild is backing Anders.

“All proceeds from Guild members books are going to Corrie’s legal defense fund,” Guild chairperson Quinn Blenny said. “Less expenses, of course. So far we’ve raised $13.54.

Anders, meanwhile, has vowed to keep writing.

“Until someone physically takes away my laptop, I’ll keep telling Larry’s story,” she said. “My readers believe in me, and that’s all that matters. ‘Larry Otter and the Order of the Lionfish’ll be out by Christmas.”

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November 10, 2017 · 8:21 am

Doping Scandal Shocks Blacktip Island Iguana Racers

doping scandal

Dermott Bottoms’ Chee-Chuck is one of the iguanas to test positive for performance-enhancing substances Thursday at the Blacktip Island iguana racetrack. (photo courtesy of Kitty Terwolbeck)

Blacktip Island’s iguana racing community was rocked Thursday afternoon by allegations of iguanas testing positive for performance-enhancing substances.

“We got suspicious when slow iguanas that had never won anything suddenly started winning races with record times,” said Blacktip Iguana Racing Club president Clete Horn. “We did random blood draws after the latest race and discovered significant levels of white rum in several iguanas.

“Turns out, rum’s a stimulant for iguanas,” Horn said. “It’s not just for dive staff anymore. We’re hoping it’s a few isolated cases by a few over-competitive trainers, but we don’t know yet.”

The trainer at the heart of the controversy downplayed the allegations.

“I always give Chee-Chuck a taste rum before the race. No big deal,” iguana trainer Dermott Bottoms said. “Calms her down. I drink some, too, for my nerves. It’s a stressful sport.”

Others in the racing community were not so dismissive.

“Big money ruined the sport, made it way more cutthroat over the past year,” iguana hostler Molly Miller said. “All the sponsorships and TV contracts, they have people cutting corners wherever they can.

“Trackside violence is on the upswing, too,” Miller said. “First there was the drunkenness, then the fights among bettors, now this. It’s not the family-friendly racecourse it used to be.”

Authorities are focused on the influence of organized crime in the sport.

“Criminal organizations are active in iguana racing across the Caribbean,” Island Police Constable Rafe Marquette said. “On-track betting’s legal, since government gets half the take, but all the off-track side betting isn’t, and that’s been a magnet for bookmaking and racketeering.

“The biggest player is Cal Amari’s outfit on Tiperon,” Marquette said. “He’s got his tentacles in every aspect of racing. With him and his Ink Stain gang so close, our concern is this race-fixing may be just the tip of the iceberg, crime-wise.”

Race fans were shaken by the news.

“If you can’t trust the outcome of the iguana races, what can you trust?” resident Ginger Bass said. “We used to bring the kiddos and make a day of it, but no more. We can’t expose them to that sort of blatant dishonesty.

“Racing fans island-wide feel like we’ve lost our innocence this week,” Bass said. “And not in a good way. It just hurts. I’m keeping the money I won on Chee-Chuck, though. To help ease the pain.”

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November 3, 2017 · 7:14 am

Fisherman Discovers Sunken Pyramids Off Blacktip Island

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Antonio Fletcher’s photo of what he claims are ancient pyramids atop a remote seamount off Blacktip Island’s northwest coast. (photo courtesy of Antonio Fletcher)

Local fisherman Antonio Fletcher says he discovered underwater pyramids on a seamount off Blacktip Island’s west coast Wednesday morning while searching for a new fishing spot.

“Went out to Robber’s Bank, where folks don’t usually go,” Fletcher said. “Had my camera on a weighted line to see where the fish were and BAM! There were these big bumps on top of the bank.

“Looked to be stair-stepped. Like Mayan and Aztec pyramids. Or maybe Egyptian,” Fletcher said. “Makes sense, you know – that was high ground before sea levels rose, and Central America’s right close by.”

Local archeologists are asking fishermen and scuba divers to avoid the seamount until they can investigate Fletcher’s claim.

“This could be the find of the century, but we can’t get to it because of ripping currents the last few days,” Tiperon University-Blacktip professor Catalina Luxfer said. “There’s no known man-made structures in this part of the Caribbean, though, so it may just be a big coral head. But if it is something, we don’t want it looted.

“That seamount’s remote, but it’s not unknown. If there’s structures like that on it, I’m not sure why someone hadn’t seen them, though,” Luxfer said. “As for Mayans and Aztecs, those are two completely different civilizations separated by thousands of years. And I’m not touching the Egyptian angle.”

The island’s non-scientists are eager to explore the site as well.

“I don’t care what Catalina wants, we’re gonna drop divemasters out there once the currents die down, see exactly what we’ve got,” said Eagle Ray Cove resort owner Rich Skerritt. “If ‘Tonio’s right, this is a major find.

“We can charge guests double for diving on Mayan pyramids, and folks’ll be lined up out the door begging to pay,” Skerritt said. “Pyramid diving could make Blacktip the premier scuba destination in the western hemisphere. Catalina can study the site all she wants while our divers are there.”

Many locals are dubious about the find.

“It’s probably just a couple of big rocks. Or sleeping turtles,” fisherman Rocky Shore said. “I mean, what kind of camera does ‘Tonio have that he can just lower it down and get reliable photos? And where’d he even get a camera? He can barely afford gas for his outboard.

“End of the day, this is ‘Tonio,” Shore said. “He thinks he’s Fletcher Christian reincarnated. It’s a wonder he didn’t claim he found Atlantis.”

Fletcher remained optimistic.

“Not saying it’s Atlantis,” he said. “But it could be part of it.”

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October 27, 2017 · 7:52 am

Blacktip Island Church Demands Ban On Split Fins

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Use of paddle-style scuba fins may become mandatory on Blacktip Island dive sites if a local religious leader’s anti-split fin campaign is successful. (photo courtesy of Steve Dingledein)

The Blacktip Island scuba diving community was polarized this week by an island religious leader’s demand that split scuba fins be banned in favor of paddle-style fins.

“These cloven-hooved fins are the devil’s work, plain and simple,” said the Rev. Pierre Grunt, head of the Blacktip Island Temperance League. “They may seem innocent, but that’s how Satan fools the unwary.”

“They’re symptomatic of the evils overwhelming our island,” Grunt said. “It’s no coincidence the reefs started dying the same time these fins showed up. To save our reefs, we have to return to the paddle fins of our forefathers.”

Grunt’s claim struck a chord among some local divers.

“I never realized how bad these fins were until Rev. Grunt opened my eyes to what’s really going on,” said island resident Edwin Chub. “That was a jaw dropper, all right. I went straight out and threw my split fins away. Lots of us did. I’m not gonna be a part of something like that.”

Local scuba operators denounced the grassroots campaign.

“Pierre scares away any resort guests with this crap, I’ll split more than his fins,” Eagle Ray Cove Resort owner Rich Skerritt said. “That goes for his rants about no diving on Sundays, too. Why would the preacher care about scuba fins? Or even notice them?”

Some Blacktip residents questioned Grunt’s motives.

“The only non-coincidence is Pierre’s part-owner in Bamboo You, and sales have tanked on their bamboo paddle-style fins,” local Clete Horn said. “Last month his schtick was an alcohol ban, and that fell flat on its face.

“He’s just switched to fins, telling a bigger whopper and hoping more folks’ll buy in,” Horn said. “Big picture, Pierre wants to fill his church. And his offering plates.”

Some in the island’s religious community worry the campaign will be detrimental long term.

“We’re being demonized over these fins,” High Druid Joey Pompano said. “People are blaming us for bringing them to the island. For encouraging people to use them.

“We don’t care what fins people use, or if they don’t use fins at all,” Pompano said. “Rev. Grunt and his BITS can go to hell. Why don’t they pick on the Unitarians once in a while?”

The Rev. Grunt remains unapologetic.

“Deuteronomy 23:13 is quite clear,” he said. “ It reads, ‘Thou shalt have a paddle upon thy person . . .’ You can’t get more straightforward than that.”

Grunt declined to comment on his ties to Bamboo You. Company officials did not return several Times phone calls.

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October 20, 2017 · 7:20 am

Underwater Headphones Let Blacktip Island Divemasters Narrate Dives

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Eagle Ray Divers divemaster Lee Helm, in a full-face mask, narrates a dive on Blacktip Island’s Jawfish reef Thursday. The resort’s new program allows in-water divemasters to talk directly to resort guests throughout their dives. (photo courtesy of NOAA)

In an effort to stay one step ahead in the competitive world of recreational scuba, one Blacktip Island resort Monday began offering reef tours led by in-water dive guides giving running commentaries to snorkel and scuba guests outfitted with waterproof headphones.

“We kit our divers out with underwater headsets, and our divemasters have full-face masks so they can talk through the entire dive,” Eagle Ray Divers manager Ger Latner said. “Before, the best a dive guide could do was point to something and maybe write a quick note on a slate. Now our DMs can give full explanations.

“We’re the only dive op on Blacktip that offers this service,” Latner said. “All the extra gear costs, but it’s worth it.”

Resort guests guests agreed

“I never know what the divemaster’s pointing at, and I can never ask,” guest Jackie Wrasse said. “I usually just signal ‘OK’ and move on. Sometimes I think they point at nothing just to mess with me.

“With this, though, I know exactly what they’re showing me,” Wrasse said. “I had no idea there were so many things down there that’re supposed to be interesting.”

Other island dive operators were critical of the tours.

“With one or two divers it can be OK,” said Club Scuba Doo dive manager Finn Kiick. “But you get 20 divers all trying to get up close to one tiny sea slug, it turns into a real Charlie Foxtrot.

“Already, you can tell where an Eagle Ray divemaster’s been,” Kiick said. “Just look for the broken sea fans and kicked-to-hell coral. No way we’re doing that to the reef.”

Some Eagle Ray Divers staff had reservations as well.

“It’s not fair, having to talk through the entire dive,” divemaster Lee Helm said. “Some people are good at it, but I like to zone out when I lead a dive. And it’s pure hell when there’s nothing to show people, but they still expect a nonstop monologue.”

Others have embraced the narration.

“It’s great being able to explain what I’m showing and why it’s cool,” said divemaster Alison Diesel. “It’s also great the guests can’t talk back. We tried that at first. It didn’t end well.”

“It’s also fun, when a diver hand-signals a question, to answer wrong just to see the look on their face,” Diesel said. “I’m playing with doing tours in rhyme, too. I started with couplets yesterday. I’m working my way up to rap.”

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October 13, 2017 · 8:11 am

Blacktip Celebrates Columbus’ Landing With Paintball Shootout

312th Engineers keep it in the family

Some of Blacktip Island’s paintball guns, collected by Island Police Constable Rafe Marquette, after Thursday’s annual Columbus’ Arrival Expat Derby. (photo courtesy of Timothy Hale)

Blacktip Island turned red for the day Thursday with the annual Columbus’ Arrival Expat Derby, which allows island locals to shoot expatriate residents with red paintball pellets.

“Columbus isn’t the hero here he is in the U.S.,” island historian Smithson Altschul said. “His arrival brought disease, genocide and slavery. The Expat Derby started as a way for locals to vent their anger at foreigners without anyone getting hurt too much.”

“In the old days, there’d be fights. Blood would flow,” Altschul said. “Community leaders started the tradition of throwing red snappers at expats instead, to decrease the violence. Then paintball guns came along and we switched. The pellets sting, but red paint’s better than blood. And it doesn’t waste food.”

Paintball guns, normally banned on the island, are regulated by the local police.

“I issue guns and paintballs in the morning, then collect them all at the end of the day,” Island Police Constable Rafe Marquette said. “There’s also strict rules concerning how the devices are employed.

“It’s body shots only, preferably above the belt,” Marquette said. “And tourists are strictly off limits, for obvious reasons. Any violators forfeit their paintball rights next year.”

Blacktip natives say the derby brings the community together.

“It’s a fun tradition that keeps resentments from getting too out of hand,” local Ger Latner said. “The island’s expats understand. Most seem to enjoy it.

“End of the day, we’re all still good friends,” Fletcher said. “We get together for drinks and to patch up any wounds in the evening. No hard feelings.”

Island expatriates echoed Latner’s sentiment.

“I just go out early, in a white shirt, and let them pop me a few times,” island Mayor Jack Cobia said. “People see a couple of splats on you, they’ll move on to someone else. Usually. I wrap my torso in towels, too. Those paintballs raise an ugly welt.

“End of the day, it keeps peace in the community,” Cobia said. “There’s a lot less locals-versus-expats hostility on Blacktip than most Caribbean islands. Bruised ribs are a small price to pay.”

Others agreed.

“I wear a scuba mask, just in case, but it’s not a big deal,” said resident Hugh Calloway. “Antonio, he drilled me good yesterday morning, right in the chest, as I stepped out my front door. Then he gave me a ride to work. And we had a drink on the way.”

Island officials say this year’s derby was relatively uneventful.

“There’ll be no paintball next year for Dermott Bottoms and James Conlee,” Constable Marquette said. “They got in a shootout with each other in front of the store. Several windows were broken, and the police vehicle will need to be repainted. I also have to buy a new police uniform.”

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October 6, 2017 · 9:31 am

Drunks Against Mad Mothers Launches Blacktip Island Chapter

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Blacktip Island’s drinkers have banded together to form a chapter of Drunks Against Mad Mothers in response to a grassroots campaign to curb drinking on the island. (photo courtesy of Dermott Bottoms)

The international alcohol-rights group Drunks Against Mad Mothers (DAMM) announced Thursday it had established its newest chapter on Blacktip Island to protect the drinking habits of the Caribbean island’s residents.

“Lots of folks criticizing, trying to close bars early and stop liquor sales,” said DAMM chapter president Dermott Bottoms. “But we got a right to drink as much as we want, so long as no one gets hurt too badly.

“This’s a drinking island, you know,” Bottoms said. “You don’t hold with drinking, go somewhere else. We were gonna strike, then ‘Tonio found out about DAMM.”

Other DAMM members agreed.

“We’re not the bad guys. And we were here first,” DAMM vice president James Conlee said. “This’s us protecting ourselves against the tyranny of the masses. And the Baptists. International drunks got our backs now. We’re an organization.”

The chapter was founded after a campaign to curb the island’s often-excessive drinking culture.

“People on Blacktip get hammered,” divemaster Alison Diesel said. “It’s pretty much the Island sport, and mostly it gets a pass. But there was a string of single-vehicle accidents in front of resorts, tourists freaked out and it got ugly on TripAdvisor.

“It would’ve blown over, but then Dermott and Antonio both dropped trou at the Prime Minister’s welcoming cocktail soiree,” Diesel said. “Next thing you know, there’s a push to get everyone on the wagon.”

Island leaders say they sought a compromise with local drinkers.

“We weren’t proposing an all-out alcohol ban,” said the Reverend Pierre Grunt, Blacktip Island Temperance Society president. “The aim was to rachet consumption back to reasonable, non-embarrassing levels and enforce public drunkenness laws. We were making progress, too, before they came up with this DAMM nonsense.

“Case in point, this past Sunday morning Dermott and James both came to church,” Grunt said. “That was huge. Of course, I wish they’d been sober. And that Dermot hadn’t fallen asleep. And snored. I won’t discuss James’ flatulence.”

Island law enforcement, meanwhile, has stayed above the fray.

“I can’t arrest every public drunk,” Island Police Constable Rafe Marquette said. “Fridays and Saturdays, I’d have to arrest most of the island. And I only have the one cell.

“Drunk drivers will still be arrested,” Marquette said. “But there’s only one of me, and lots of them. My advice, as ever, is not to drive if you’ve consumed alcohol. But when you do, please avoid trees, pedestrians and the booby pond.”

DAMM members say they hope to change the public perception of them as irresponsible alcoholics.

“It’s not right, folks calling us alcoholics,” Bottoms said. “We’re not alcoholics. Alcoholics go to meetings. We’re drunks. We go to parties.”

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September 29, 2017 · 7:07 am

Eiffel Tower Replica Is Blacktip Island’s Newest Dive Site

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Starting Saturday, Blacktip Island scuba divers will be able to explore an underwater 1:10-scale steel replica of the Eiffel Tower. The privately-constructed structure honors the invention of the open circuit scuba regulator in France in 1942. (photo courtesy of Stoney MacAdam/Blacktip Island Public Works)

Blacktip Island scuba divers can now explore a replica of the Eiffel Tower after local entrepreneurs and public works officials teamed up to build a 130-foot, mostly-underwater tower replica off the Caribbean island’s northwest coast. The structure celebrates the 75th anniversary Jacques Cousteau’s introduction of the open-circuit scuba regulator.

“Blacktip’s a scuba island, and this is our shout-out to Jack Cousteau,” local businessman Rich Skerritt said. “A statue of him, or of the regulator, seemed disrespectful. Then we hit on the idea of the tower, what with its French connection and all, and voila!

“It’ll be a scuba icon, just like the real tower’s a Parisian icon,” Skerritt said. “We kept it tasteful, with a flashing light show every hour and everything. It’ll be even better once it gets a bit of coral growth and attracts some fish life.”

Skerritt’s associates agreed.

“Diving-wise, it’s like those oil platforms in the Gulf of Mexico, just shallower and easier to get to,” resort owner Sandy Bottoms said. “We made sure it stuck out of the water a good 15 feet for safety and so boats can tie off on it. For a fee. And we got plans for an underwater restaurant on it, too.”

Not all Blacktip residents are happy with the tower.

“It’s an eyesore and an environmental nightmare,” said Harry Pickett, president of the Blacktip Benthic Society. “Acres of coral were destroyed to build that monstrosity. Rich and Sandy want to turn the reef into their private amusement park.”

Others voiced safety concerns.

“It’s a navigational hazard, plain and simple,” Marine Parks spokesperson B.C. Flote said. “It’s a distraction for aircraft, too. Monday’s late flight mistook the tower light show for the landing strip. Luckily there were night divers there to save the passengers and recover all the luggage.”

The tower’s designer brushed aside those concerns.

“We purposely built that sucker at the edge of the wall,” Public Works engineer Stoney MacAdam said. “The current took any construction sediment right out to sea.

“And those lights are a safety feature,” MacAdam said. “Lost divers, night divers, they can always find the tower. Some pilot can’t tell the difference between the Eiffel Tower and an airfield, that’s a training issue. It’s not on us.”

Skerritt bristled at criticism of his resort charging double to dive the site.

“That tower cost a pretty penny. We got to recoup our investment,” he said. “And with the ripping currents out there, we also have to have a chase boat down current to grab any yahoos who don’t clip onto an I-beam quick enough. That kind of attention to safety costs money.”

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September 22, 2017 · 6:08 am

Genetically-Modified Asparagus May Revolutionize Blacktip Economy

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A new strain of giant asparagus may transform Blacktip Island from a sleepy tourism spot to a regional food supplier if local agricultural and business leaders have their way. (photo courtesy of Redd Birch)

An agricultural experiment gone awry has produced a strain of giant asparagus that Blacktip Island scientific and business leaders said Friday has the potential to transform the Caribbean island’s economy.

“We were working on a genetically-modified asparagus that wouldn’t make people’s urine smell,” horticulturist Redd Birch said. “The gene splicing went wonky somewhere, and we ended up with these 10-foot monsters. We didn’t solve the pee smell problem, but the stalks are tender and tasty.

“This strain thrives in the mix of rocky earth, intense sunlight and high salt levels of our bluff-top farm,” Birch said. “It’s a fast grower, too. We did our first large-scale planting at the end of June, and we already reaped our first crop. This could revolutionize the region’s food supply.”

Island business leaders agreed.

“We can feed every resident and every resort guest with just one stalk a day,” said Chamber of Commerce president Ham Pilchard. “Redd’s got so many of those things growing now, we’ll be exporting a ton, too. This is a game changer. Blacktip’s not reliant just on tourism for income anymore.

“It’s created jobs, too,” Pilchard said. “Folks are lining up to tend and harvest the stuff. They may be freakish mutations, and there’s no telling what they’re doing to the people eating them, but so far it’s been a win for everyone.”

Island resorts were quick to embrace the new crop.

“It’s a the perfect island-based farm-to-market food source,” Blacktip Haven chef Jessie Catahoula said. “It’s totally renewable and totally green. Literally. And fresh as you can get.

“The guests love it, too,” Catahoula said. “Yeah, we get the occasional complaint about the odor, but no one’s turned down a serving of asparagus risotto or crepes yet.”

Not all locals are happy with the crop, though.

“The stench coming from the resorts just about knocks you out,” long-time resident Helen Maples said. “The entire west coast reeks of asparagus micturition. This new crop may provide inexpensive food, but long term, that odor can’t be good for business.”

Some tourism workers agreed.

“You think peed-in wetsuits smell bad? Come on the dive boat and get a whiff of post-giant-asparagus-at-lunch peed-in wetsuit,” said Eagle Ray Divers divemaster Gage Hoase. “We’re begging people not to pee in their suits. Two divemasters quit just this morning because of the stench.”

Birch said he and other growers plan to further refine the crop.

“We have plans for underground farming, too, to get giant white asparagus,” he said. “Our first crop in the old airplane hangar were fairly successful. It wasn’t completely dark, so we ended up with pale, lime-green stalks.”

The new crop has also resulted in an unforeseen real estate boom.

“Used to be, that bluff-top land was worthless,” local fisherman James Conlee said. “Now, those property values are jumping. Kind of like with the ‘worthless’ beachfront land in the 60s and 70s.

“Daddy and Granddaddy were fisherman,” Conlee said. “Now, there’s more money to be made farming. It’s tough work, but chain sawing asparagus is a lot more fun than hauling in snapper in eight-foot seas.”

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September 15, 2017 · 6:55 am

Fish On Strike At Blacktip Island Dive Sites

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Blacktip Island scuba divers are blaming the island’s French angelfish for inciting a swim-off strike involving all the fish at all the Caribbean island’s dive sites. (photo courtesy of Barry Peters)

Scuba divers on Blacktip Island reefs Wednesday and Thursday were surprised to find the dive sites empty of reef fish, in what experts are calling a cross-species protest.

“We’ve never seen anything like this,” said Eagle Ray Divers operations manager Ger Latner. “As of yesterday morning it was hard to find any fish at all, and the ones you did see would taunt you, then dart away.

“It started with the French angelfish turning tail on photographers,” Latner said. “Then all the other fish followed suit. Guests thought it was funny at first, but now everyone’s pissed off. Every photo from today has been of bare coral or a fish’s butt. Even the sea slugs are hiding under the coral heads.”

Local marine biologists say the phenomenon is likely a form of piscine protest.

“Based on what data we have, our working theory is the fish are consciously spurning divers due to an environmental stressor,” said Tiperon University-Blacktip biology professor Ernesto Mojarra. “It happens a lot. You just don’t hear about it.

“Given the hostility displayed toward photographers, most likely the fish are tired of underwater strobes flashing in their faces all day,” Mojarra said. “They’ve made no demands yet. That we know of. They can be difficult to read, but we have our best biologists on site to mediate.”

Local resort owners, though, are not waiting patiently.

“I don’t care what they’re hacked off about, this is killing my business,” Sandy Bottoms’ Beach Resort owner Sandy Bottoms said. “It figures it’s the French angelfish behind it. Those bastards are always starting trouble.

“They demanded vacation time last year,” Bottoms said. “Got the idea from the grouper, who take off for a week on the spawning grounds every winter. Now all the other fish want entitlements. We need to cut them loose and bring in new fish who’ll be grateful to have a reef like this. You think the lionfish won’t jump at the chance?”

Experts, however, warned such action could escalate into violence.

“This morning a multi-species school circled Hammerhead Reef for hours,” Mojarra said. “A bunch of barracuda watched, but didn’t join in. If the barras, or the sharks, get involved, things could get ugly. Fast.

“We need to rachet things down a notch,” Mojarra said. “Banning cameras and strobes from the dive sites would be a good start. It’s drastic, but that good-faith gesture could be the thing that resolves this.”

While most guests were angered by the lack of marine life, some were unexpectedly supportive.

“I came here to look at the fish, sure, but it’s their right to not hang with divers,” said Blacktip Haven guest Maxie Fondé. “They’re wild animals, after all.

“Big picture, I support what they’re doing,” Fondé said. “I mean, if I don’t stand up for their rights, who, or what, will stand up for mine when the time comes?”

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