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August 19, 2016 · 7:31 am

Blacktip Island Physicists Discover Blacktip Boson

Blacktip boson

Particle physicists Ginny Wrasse, left, and Leah Shore inspect the sensor housing at the Blacktip Island Gravitational Laser Interferometer Detection array outside the CrabbiLab laboratory Thursday. Laboratory physicists claim to have discovered a subatomic particle capable of generating short-lived, localized gravitational fields. (Photo courtesy of Tila Monto)

In a paper published Thursday in the international science journal Creation, Blacktip Island scientists claim to have discovered a subatomic particle dubbed, ‘the Blacktip boson,’ that can create an extremely localized gravity well for a split second.

“People’ve noticed the phenomena for years,” lead author and particle physicist Barry Bottoms said. “Locals call them ‘gravity storms,’ where a person or object will fall for no apparent reason, with nearby objects not affected.

“You’d see it late Friday and Saturday nights, usually in bars, though, so it got passed off as alcohol induced,” Bottoms said. “Then we noticed it happening to tourists on bikes in the middle of the day, and that got us wondering.”

Bottoms and his colleagues at the Caribbean island’s Crabbilab Accelerator Laboratory built a device to isolate the phenomenon.

“We spring-boarded off Caltech’s gravity wave research to make an array to detect gravitational anomalies,” said article co-author Leah Shore. “It’s a small island with limited resources, but we were able to find some cement conduit, and we scrounged an old laser interferometer fom the dump.

“We’d barely activated the sensors when we got confirmation,” Shore said. “There was a massive gamma radiation spike, then – BAM! – Barry toppled over. With no alcohol involved – we tested his blood.”

The scientists were cautious in assessing the discovery’s importance.

“All we can say for certain is we detected a boson that, under the right conditions, can exert a massless spin-2 field – the Blacktip Field – to create micro-instants of increased gravity,” Bottoms said. “Could that blow the doors open on string theory? Sure. But we have more pressing concerns.

“What triggers the field and why is it so prevalent here?” Bottoms said. “Our theory is Blacktip Fields are the result of interplay between Blacktip’s unique combination solar radiation, booby pond fumes and the numerous ley lines crossing the island.”

Local reaction the discovery was less reserved.

“This tells the world Blacktip’s not such a backwater,” mayor Jack Cobia said. “Visitors joke about Blacktip being the island of sloppy drunks. Now, to find out it’s a sub-atomic whaddyacallit, well, Barry and his gang deserve a medal.”

Others echoed Cobia’s sentiment.

“Science-wise, it’s great to finally smack down St. Kitts and Nevis,” resident Antonio Fletcher said. “Those punks’ve been rubbing our noses in it ever since they found that wobble in Uranus’ orbit. Plus, my Daddy was a bosun’s mate, so I’m doubly proud.”

Other locals were eager to put the Blacktip Field to use.

“They keep saying there’s no practical application for this thing,” the former-Reverend Jerrod Ephesians said. “But how great would it be to harness it, to give extra mass to stuff that needs it? Like the mixed drinks at the Last Ballyhoo.”

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August 12, 2016 · 8:43 am

Volunteers Salvage Blacktip Island Continuing Education Program

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The Blacktip Island Theosophy Hall, where most of the island’s adult continuing education classes are being conducted after a local businessman withdrew his financial support for the program. (photo courtesy of Peachy Bottoms)

Community groups teamed up with Tiperon University-Blacktip Wednesday to save the Blacktip Island’s adult continuing education program after a local financier withdrew his backing.

“Damn straight I pulled the plug on that nonsense,” said Rich Skerritt, owner of Eagle Ray Cove resort. “Waste of time and money, people learning basket weaving and water-color painting. The idea was to offer courses that’d let folks to better their lives, get better jobs, be more productive.

“But no one wanted to learn about computer reservation systems or housekeeping or carpentry or landscaping,” Skerritt said. “They were all hot for the hippy-dippy, me-me-me crap. Well, there’s no profit in personal enrichment. No return on investment, for them or for me.”

The decision didn’t surprise program organizers.

“Rich bankrolled the con-ed program to churn out worker bees for his resort,” continuing education coordinator Peachy Bottoms said. “He got hacked off when he realized people were taking courses aimed at personal development. It was just a matter of time.

“We talked to the TU-B administration and the Rotary Club about underwriting the courses,” Bottoms said. “Our instructors agreed to teach pro gratis, and for classrooms we use the Theosophy Hall behind Harry Master’s Bait Shoppe and Newsstand.”

Many island residents applauded the 11th-hour deal.

“The adult classes are a boost for the island,” longtime resident Edwin Chub said. “It keeps people engaged and learning. My wife’s taking a scrapbooking course. And I myself am learning Turkish. That’s been a lifelong dream of mine.”

Other residents took a broader view.

“Blacktip’s a tiny island. There’s nothing to do,” divemaster Alison Diesel said. “Most people get off work and head to the bars. These con ed classes lift us above that.

“They tell the world there’s more to Blacktip than diving,” Diesel said. “It says we’re an island of thought and intellectual growth. The Athens of the Caribbean. The Greek Athens, not the one in Georgia.”

The classes have also led several residents to unexpected personal discoveries.

“I don’t say it often, but Rich was wrong on this one,” Public Works chief Stoney MacAdam said. “The fly-tying class was full up, so I ended up in an ice sculpture course. Turns out, it’s fun and practical.

“It’s hot as blazes this summer, so I got to carve in the freezer. That means the sculptures’re pretty small,” MacAdam said. “But it’s about the experience, not the product. And I got these racks of little ice-cube hummingbirds I can plop in folk’s rum when they come over. Way I see it, I got me a retirement job.”

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August 5, 2016 · 7:33 am

Blacktip Island Reef Preservation Rally Turns Violent

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The Our Lady of Blacktip non-denominational cathedral was the site of a street brawl between scuba divers and music lovers Thursday afternoon. (photo courtesy of Dorris Blenny)

A coral reef conservation rally at a Blacktip Island resort left 11 people injured Thursday evening after two groups of activists attacked each other over a misunderstanding about the event’s purpose.

“We were out front of Sandy Bottoms’, drumming up support for the island’s reefs,” Coral Reef Activists for Preservation president Harry Pickett said. “We had our placards, and were handing out leaflets. It was a great turnout of locals and tourists. Everything was going fine.

“Next thing you know, though, there’s yahoos across the road, by the church, yelling at us about singing or something,” Pickett said. “Somebody yelled back and it just exploded from there.”

The rival protestors were music aficionados who had gathered at the Our Lady of Blacktip interdenominational cathedral to support what they believed to be an attack on the island’s community chorus.

“The radio announcement clearly said ‘choral preservation,’” choirmaster Doris Blenny said. “We got there and found an angry mob picketing outside the church. We weren’t about to lose our choir or gospel singers to those Philistines. Not without a fight.”

Island officials say the conflict escalated quickly.

“Near as I can tell, the church folks thought the scuba divers were anti-music agitators,” Island Police Constable Rafe Marquette said. “A random word set someone off, and all hell broke loose.

“The churchgoers waded in swinging their protests signs. Those things were made with good, solid maple, too,” Marquette said. “After a moment of shock, the divers roared right back at them, screaming and whomping. It’s amazing more people weren’t hurt.”

Police credit local lay clergy with restoring the peace.

“Jerrod went all Kwai Chang Caine on the whole lot of them,” Marquette said. “I know now why they defrocked him. He kept casualties to a minimum, though.”

“Neither side responded to reason,” said the former-Reverend Jerrod Ephesians. “Blood was flying and the situation needed to be defused, physically, without injuring anyone. Unnecessarily.

“Years of online Shaolin meditation training just kicked in,” Ephesians said. “I don’t really remember what happened, but once the leaders were subdued, the rest of the mob fell in line.”

Ephesians declined I.P.C. Marquette’s offer to become a Special Constable.

“We need to focus on healing the community, not on punishment,” Ephesians said. “We’re planning a reef-themed musical event for this weekend. We’ll come together to show reefs and music aren’t mutually exclusive.

“Blacktip Island’s famous for its singing coral heads, after all,” Ephesians said. “To simulate that sound on stage, the church choir will sing ‘Octopus’ Garden’ with their heads in fish bowls.”

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July 29, 2016 · 7:38 am

Blacktip Island Gets Travel Ban From U.S., U.K.

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Blacktip Island officials hope the sun won’t set on the small Caribbean island’s tourism industry after multiple nations issued a travel warning advising their citizens not to visit the secluded vacation mecca.

Blacktip Island officials hope the sun won’t set on the small Caribbean island’s tourism industry after multiple nations issued a travel warning advising their citizens not to travel to the secluded vacation mecca.

At the urging of the International Psychiatric Association, the United States, United Kingdom and European Union Friday issued a travel warning for citizens visiting Blacktip Island.

“We’ve had a travel alert in place for a while, but after the I.P.A.’s report we kicked it up to a warning,” U.S. State Department spokesperson Roosevelt Franklin said. “People on that island are just not right. They’ve been isolated too long.

“The report says the mental instability can be passed person-to-person, and we’re studying other possible vectors,” Washington said. “The concern is a mental-health pandemic – tourists traveling there, contracting bat-shit, then transporting it back home.”

Island residents downplayed the warning.

“The hullaballoo got started with that You Tube video of the naked conga line at Eagle Ray Cove – spontaneous, mind you, and started by a U.S. State Department retiree,” Blacktip Island Chamber of Commerce president Reg Gurnard said. “Then James Conlee planted himself at the airstrip in that home-made flower pot of his and tried to use ESP to get tourists to water him. Mostly, he just scared people with the faces he made.

“The capper was Dermott Bottoms literally howling at the moon from the Sandy Bottoms Beach Resort roof at three in the morning,” Gurnard said. “It would’ve been laughed off if he hadn’t peed on all the departing guests’ luggage the next morning. No quicker way to piss off a visiting shrink than that.”

The governments also issued a travel ban on Blacktip residents wanting to visit their countries.

“Blacktippers are bonkers,” Franklin said. “The study says anyone who’s lived on that island for more than 3.57 years could pose a real threat to our citizens. We’re not about to import that.”

Blacktip residents refuted the report.

“That’s just their opinion, you know,” said Blacktip Island native James Conlee. “From a bunch of black thumbs who can’t be trusted to water their flowers properly. You ask me, I think we should ban them.”

The official response was more muted.

“Obviously, we can’t ban tourists from an island devoted to tourism,” Blacktip Island mayor Jack Cobia said. “Not even the New Yorkers. But we’re being unfairly singled out. Folks on Grand Turk are completely deranged, but no one says ‘boo’ about them.

“We’ve lodged official protest with the U.S. and U.K. ambassadors,” Cobia said. “Or we will as soon as they answer our calls and emails and thought waves. I can assure you of that.”

Other residents were not bothered by the warning.

“It’s Blacktip. This’ll pass,” said Sandy Bottoms Beach Resort manager Kay Valve. “Meantime, it draws more attention to us and attracts adventure-seeking guests.

“Every resort on the island is chock-a-block full because of that report,” Valve said. “Just spell ‘Blacktip Island’ right, you know?”

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July 22, 2016 · 6:27 am

New Dinosaur Species Discovered On Blacktip Island

blacktiposaurus

The partial skeleton of the recently discovered Blacktiposaurus lies exposed in geologic sediment scientists have identified as from the early Flirtaceous period. The creature may be the missing link between extinct reptiles and modern birds. (photo courtesy of Ernesto Mojarra)

Two Blacktip Island hikers exploring the island’s rugged interior Wednesday discovered the fossilized remains of what experts believe is a new species of dinosaur linking the ancient reptiles to modern aquatic birds.

“We were fell-walking up on the bluff, and the nesting kingbirds kept dive bombing us, pecking at our heads,” divemaster Lee Helm said. “It was miserable. We were picking up stones to throw at them when Alison noticed an odd-looking pattern in the limestone.”

“You could totally tell it was something, or a couple of things all mooshed up together,” boat captain Alison Diesel said. “It took a few seconds to register. The thing’s about the size of a medium-sized goat.”

Specialists rushed to confirm the pair’s find.

“It’s pretty unbelievable, frankly,” said Ernesto Mojarra, head of Tiperon University-Blacktip’s paleontology department. “The skeleton shows a unique mix of reptilian scales and claws as well as avian feathers and beak structure. We’re calling it Blacktiposaurus.

“Preliminary guess, the creature was flightless, though a strong swimmer, and looked something like our modern booby birds, but with spines down its back,” Mojarra said. “With so many boobies and iguanas on Blacktip Island, this could be a common ancestor.”

Some locals were skeptical.

“The only dinosaurs anyone’s likely to find on Blacktip are at the bottom of a rum bottle,” the Reverend Pierre Grunt said. “Iguanas and boobies have always been here. In Earth’s 6,000-year history, nothing’s ever evolved on this island. Except drug-resistant social diseases.”

Others were eager to preserve the fossil for future study.

“Blacktiposaurus rests in the sedimentary strata just above the K-T layer that marks the end of the Cretaceous period,” TU-B geologist Christina Grasby said. “With the bones smack on top of all that iridium-enriched dust and tektite spheres, this is the first evidence of saurian life surviving into the early Flirtaceous period following the Chicxulub asteroid impact in the Yucatan.”

Island entrepreneurs are backing the preservation efforts as well.

“That thing-gummy’s a gold mine,” said local businessman Rich Skerritt. “People’ll pay to see it, and they’ll pay more to watch Ernesto and his buddies fiddle with it. Excavate it. Whatever.

“An outdoor interactive museum is a natural, where folks can watch the dig,” Skerritt said. “Something tasteful. Then throw in food and beverage concessions, a gift shop, a couple of roller coasters, Blacktip’ll be a must-visit Caribbean destination in no time.”

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July 15, 2016 · 7:45 am

Blacktip Island Divemasters Launch Underwater Jenga League

Jenga

One of the last parking chocks still above water on Blacktip Island, with an underwater giant Jenga team’s lift bag and mallet, in the Blacktip Haven resort parking lot.

Members of a newly-formed underwater giant Jenga league have illegally cleared Blacktip Island’s parking lots of cement parking chocks for use as game blocks, island authorities said Friday.

In conventional Jenga, players take turns removing one wooden block at a time from a tower of blocks, then balance that block on top of the stack to create a progressively taller but less stable structure.

“It started with bored divemasters and a load of sunken chocks that fell overboard out from the public dock,” Island Police Constable Rafe Marquette said. “Next thing you know, they’re dragging chocks from resort parking lots and chucking them into the sea.

“After a YouTube video, it really took off,” Marquette said “Now they’ve hauled off every parking bumper that’s not bolted down so they can make a regulation 54-block set. I’d arrest them all, but there’s no proof who committed the actual thefts.”

Players preferred to focus on the intricacies of the game.

“It’s giant Jenga, only with more adrenalin,” said divemaster Alison Diesel. “Each block weighs, like, 200 pounds. Two-person teams use lift bags to make a block neutrally buoyant, then tap it out of the pile with rubber mallets.

“Both people have to be in synch, or things get ugly,” Diesel said. “Personal buoyancy control’s a biggie, too. You’re down in the sand when a six-foot tower crashes down, you’re crab food.”

League organizers brushed aside talk of the game’s illegality.

“We’ve done nothing wrong and no one stole anything,” de facto league president Jerrod Ephesians said. “The blocks were underwater debris. We’re simply using them. And we never have matches when the barge is due. That’d create a navigational hazard.

“The only problem we’ve had is a couple of ugly incidents involving husband-and-wife teams,” Ephesians said. “Kitty Smarr swore she dumped her lift bag by accident, and that she was yelling for help, but Mickey damn-near got crushed, and it sure sounded like Kitty was laughing through her regulator.”

Police, meanwhile, are concerned the missing bumpers imperil public safety.

“There’s not a single chock in any of the island’s car parks,” Marquette said. “That creates a dangerous situation. I can seize the ones that’ve been sunk, but I have no way to get them out of the water. Meantime, motorists are damaging vehicles, buildings and themselves without chocks to stop the cars.”

One local business owner is using the Jenga matches to cover the cost of new parking bumpers at his resort.

“We put in underwater cameras at Diddley’s Landing,” said Rich Skerritt, owner of Eagle Ray Cove resort. “We’re charging folks to watch the live feed at the bar. That, and the alcohol sales, should recoup the cost of chocks. And when we get new ones, we’re gonna pound them in place with five, six feet of rebar so these scuba hippies can’t steal them.”

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July 8, 2016 · 8:49 am

Flare Gun Shootout Mars Blacktip Island Unity Day

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Some of the emergency signaling pyrotechnics seized by Blacktip Island police after Thursday night’s signal-flare shootout. (photo courtesy of Raphael Marquette)

A flare gun battle between two Blacktip Island Unity Day dock parties, celebrating the island’s varied cultures living peacefully together, resulted in three arrests, fourteen injuries and the confiscation of all flares and flare pistols Thursday night.

“It started as good holiday fun,” said Clete Horn, whose eyebrows were scorched off in the melee. “We had country music playing on our dock, the Sand Spit Bar had reggae blasting on theirs, and people were hollering back and forth at one another.

“Each party had its own fireworks show, and they started at the same time,” Horn said. ‘Next thing you know, folks were adding their own fireworks, trying to outdo the other dock.”

Police say the situation escalated quickly.

“First it was bottle rockets being fired dock-to-dock, then Roman candles,” said Island Police Constable Rafe Marquette. “Next thing we knew, people had broken out emergency signal pistols and were blazing away.

“At one point party-goers were swimming out to moored dive boats to rearm themselves with nautical flares,” Marquette said. “They were even firing those big parachute flares to see their targets better.”

The island’s medical clinic was overwhelmed by the injuries.

“I’m not set up for something on this scale,” island nurse Marissa Wrasse said. “There were so many burns, I ran out of unguent. I had to grab mayonnaise from the ‘fridge and slather that on burns.

“Ran out of that, too, by the end,” Wrasse said. “Dermott Bottoms took a direct hit right down the back of his shorts. You have no idea the size of Dermott Bottoms’ bottom.”

Authorities confiscated all incendiaries to prevent further violence, a move that angered some locals.

“It’s not safe, Rafe leaving us with nothing but survival mirrors,” boat captain Marina DeLow said. “What if we have an emergency and need to signal for help?”

The police, however, remained adamant.

“Damn right I seized all the flares,” Marquette said. “These yobbos were even throwing smoke canisters and orange dye markers at each other.

“This is why they can’t have nice things,” Marquette said. “Until they learn how to use pyrotechnics responsibly, they’ll just have to jump up and down and waive their arms if there’s an emergency.”

Unity Day organizers, meanwhile, have scheduled an alcohol-free follow-up celebration Friday evening they hope will bring the island community back together.

“We figured we’d get everyone in one place, then sit down and talk things out,” Unity Day committee chair Kay Valve said. “Of course, Dermott’ll have to stand, but that’ll be a reminder why this is so important.”

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July 1, 2016 · 7:18 am

Blacktip Island Votes Itself Independent

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A new day dawns on Blacktip Island after residents Wednesday voted to declare themselves an independent nation. (photo courtesy of Rocky Shore)

In a surprise referendum Wednesday, Blacktip Island residents chose overwhelmingly to leave the Tiperon Islands. The vote, if approved by the Blacktip Island Commission, would establish the small Caribbean island as an independent nation.

The vote, known locally as the Bleave, was called after an increase in import duty for alcohol from Tiperon, the capital island, resulted in several days of public protest on Blacktip.

“You better believe I voted to Bleave,” island mayor Jack Cobia said. “Our so-called representative on the big island wasn’t elected. Blacktip’s a small island, out on the edge of things. Last election, we just plain forgot to vote. That’s when politicos in the capitol appointed one of their cronies.

“Next thing you know, our man – a preacher, no less – votes to double the price of our booze,” Cobia said. “We scheduled a vote to stop the riots, and, boy, did folks turned out. Well, three folks, anyway. But we all voted ‘out.’”

Critics say independence could cripple the island’s economy.

“There’s no way this little sand spit can survive on its own,” said Rocky Shore, economics professor at Tiperon University-Blacktip. “Tourism’s all Blacktip has, and 100 drunks can’t provide the infrastructure to support that product.

“Democracy’s not always best,” Shore said. “Voters should have stayed home again instead of turning out to vote.”

The pro camp, though, expects the island’s economy to thrive.

“All the dive operations and bars are going like gangbusters,” said Rick Skerritt, owner of Eagle Ray Cove resort. “Us Blacktippers are used to looking out for ourselves, and each other.

“My ancestors came to this island with nothing but their dreams. And investment capital,” Skerritt said. “I’ll be damned if some pencil pusher from Tiperon’s gonna run my life.”

Others took a more low-key approach.

“Sure, people are up in arms, but nothing’ll change,” handyman Antonio Fletcher said. “It’s Blacktip Island. Nothing ever changes.

“It’s good being on our own,” Fletcher said. “Tiperon’s got too many foreigners, anyway. And teetotalers.”

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June 24, 2016 · 7:59 am

Craft Distillery Plumbs Rum To Blacktip Island Homes

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Barry Bottoms demonstrates a newly-installed Bottoms Up rum-delivery faucet in a Blacktip Island home. (photo courtesy of Bottoms Up Distillery)

A Blacktip Island distillery’s plan to pipe rum to every home on the island came under fire Thursday from an unlikely alliance of the island’s religious community and bar owners.

“Drinking’s already out of control on this little rock,” said the Rev. Pierre Grunt. “This plan will let people sit at their sink and drink until they pass out.

“Before, at least they had to get up and go to a bar,” Grunt said. “And what’s to keep little children away from the tap?”

Brewery owners defended their plan.

“Our market’s tiny. We’re fighting to survive financially,” Bottoms Up Distillery president Barry Bottoms said. “The idea’s to make our new Bottoms Up dark rum readily available to everyone.

“I don’t understand why Pierre’s got his shorts in such a wad,” Bottoms said. “The taps have child-proof locks. And with so many people drinking at home, this’ll cut down on drunk driving, too.”

Grunt found support from the island’s bar owners.

“Barry’s playing dirty pool, siphoning customers away from us,” said Eagle Ray Cove resort owner Rich Skerritt. “Before, we’d buy booze from Barry, mark it up, sell it to our patrons. This plan cuts us out of the loop.

“Don’t know what kind of pipes Barry’s using, but they better be sturdy,” Skerritt said. “No telling what kind of damage a burrowing iguana or land crab might do to those lines, if you take my meaning.”

Many residents, however, are excited about the plan.

“It’ll be great, never being out of hootch,” divemaster Gage Hoase said. “Unless you don’t pay your bill and they cut you off. And the monthly billing’s like running a bar tab, really. Plus, they give volume discounts.

“The only hitch I can see is a pressure drop if too many people go for a drink at the same time,” Hoase said. “Like halftime during the Super Bowl or something.”

Bottoms, meanwhile, said Bottoms Up is sensitive to residents who oppose the plan.

“Getting your house rum plumbed is 100 percent optional,” Bottoms said. “It does increase the home’s resale value, though, so we’re suggesting church goers and A.A. types get the line installed and then just cap it off.

“We have plans to run separate lines for light and dark rums, eventually,” Bottoms said. “And if it works well on Blacktip, we’ll branch out to the other Tiperon islands.”

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June 17, 2016 · 6:15 am

Vintage Scuba Enthusiasts Face Opposition On Blacktip Island

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Blacktip Island Mossback Club president Jay Valve’s vintage 1961 double-hose regulator at Diddley’s Landing public peir after a recent club shore dive. (photo courtesy of Jay Valve)

A vintage scuba diving club on Blacktip Island came under fire Thursday from dive operators and medical professionals who claim the group’s activities undermine public safety.

“No one’ll let us use our older gear on the dive boats, so we got together to dive on our own,” said Jay Valve, president of the Blacktip Island Mossbacks. “ I’ve been using this reg for 55 years, and it still works great. Why should I ditch it just because some 20-something dive bum tells me it’s out of date?

“I service my kit like clockwork. It’s as safe as any modern rig,” Valve said. “Next thing you know they’ll tell me a have to use a dive computer.”

Dive professionals say the mid-century equipment is inherently dangerous.

“Jay’s regulator’s older than my dad,” said Club Scuba Doo dive manager Finn Kiick. “Makes the same noises Dad does, too. There’s no way we’re letting Jay on our boat. That reg doesn’t even have a pressure gauge.

“Knuckleheads want to go out and drown themselves, they’re welcome to it,” Kiick said. “Just don’t make us fill out any paperwork or talk to lawyers. Blacktip has boats and beaches. Beaches are good for them.”

Public safety officials want the group’s activities banned altogether.

“These are antiquated divers, trudging in from shore with antiquated equipment,” Public Health Director Herring Frye said. “It’s multiple coronaries waiting to happen. We don’t have the staff or infrastructure to handle that kind of thing.

“And what happens when youngsters see them and want to dive like that, too?” Frye said. “The police need to shut this down before someone dies.”

Island police say their hands are tied.

“No law about what kind of scuba equipment you can use, so long as you have a dive flag,” Island Police Constable Rafe Marquette said. “Looks kind of cool, too, all those ‘Sea Hunt’ rigs getting used. Reminds me of my Daddy’s gear.”

Club members, meanwhile, vowed to dive on.

“We’re all in better shape than most of the guests on the dive boats,” Mossback Clete Horn said. “And there’s a simplicity to this older equipment, an authenticity, if you will, that modern gear lacks. We’re not hung up on technology. We just dive.”

One resort, meanwhile, has embraced the club and its philosophy.

“They want authentic, we’ll take ‘em out on that old P.O.S. boat we can’t sell,” Eagle Ray Cove owner Rich Skerritt said. “It’s older than some of those museum pieces they’re diving with.

“If it sinks with them on it, well, that ads to the realism, doesn’t it?” Skerritt said. “We charge an up fee for an adventure dive and write the boat off on insurance.”

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