Category Archives: Scuba Diving

March 30, 2018 · 7:43 am

Underwater Chaucer Will Raise Money For Blacktip Island Library

interpretive dance

Marina DeLow, right, as ‘Nature,’ approaches Alison Diesel, as ‘The Formel,’ during the dress rehearsal of the Blacktip Island Community Players’ underwater interpretive dance, The Parliament of Foules, Thursday afternoon. (photo courtesy of Steve Dunleavy)

The Blacktip Island Community Players will celebrate Geoffrey Chaucer’s birthday Saturday and Sunday with an underwater interpretive dance, in three movements, based on Chaucer’s The Parliament of Foules. The performances will raise funds for a new Blacktip Island Public Library.

“In Chaucer’s day, ‘foule’ could mean either ‘bird’ or ‘fool,’” BICP artistic director Doris Blenny said. “We thought that was quite appropriate for Blacktip. And for our dancer-divers.

“The idea is this new twist on one of Chaucer’s lesser-known works would be perfect to raise money for a new library,” Blenny said. “Sadly, the demise of the old library left a hole in the heart of our community. Two books weren’t returned and the other was destroyed in the kitchen fire.”

Cast members hope the combination of subject and venue will resonate with the audience.

“Parliament is one of Chaucer’s early dream poems, so the surreal imagery, described in Middle English, leaves it open to many interpretations,” said diver-dancer Gauge Hoase. “Plus, we’re doing it on Canterbury Reef, on the island’s northern tip, so with the currents up there, you never know what’s going to happen.”

The cast was chosen from among BICP’s most experienced divers, including:

  • Finn Kiick as Geoffrey/The Narrator
  • Marina DeLow as Nature
  • Lee Helm as Osprey 1
  • Hugh Calloway as Osprey 2
  • Alison Diesel as The Formel
  • Gage Hoase as Scippio Africanus the Elder
  • Antonio Fletcher, James Conlee and Dermott Bottoms as Other Foules

Locals civic groups protested certain aspects of the performance.

“Art’s fine, and we all like to watch, but this should be a family-friendly show,” the Reverend Pierre Grunt said. “We could overlook a figurative ‘nether ye’ and ‘scalded towte,’ but we drew the line at the Narrator jumping out of bed ‘al nakkèd.’

“Doris saw the wisdom of that, and last minute changed Gage’s costume to a neutral-toned dive skin,” Grunt said. “Plus, a straw poll showed no one wanted to see Gage in the buff. Especially while drinking.”

No on-site viewing will be permitted due to safety concerns given the area’s strong currents. Instead, performances will be transmitted live to all island bars.

“You get blown off the wall, next stop is Tiperon in 70, 80 miles,” Marina DeLow said. “And if you miss that, hellooo, Cuba. The chase boats had enough of a time collecting divers during rehearsals.”

Organizers say remote viewing will encourage audience participation.

“There’ll be round-table discussions at all the bars afterwards, and a final session at the Heritage House where delegates from all the bars can present their opinions to, hopefully, achieve some sort of island-wide consensus,” Blenny said.

Cast members brushed off criticism that Chaucer’s exact date of birth has never been determined.

“He wrote a lot about April, so this could be his birthday. That’s all that matters,” Finn Kiick said. “At least we know Chaucer was real. Not like that sock puppet Shakespeare.”

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March 9, 2018 · 9:28 am

Blacktip Island Nudibranchs Write Limericks In The Sand

nudibranch writing

Scuba divers discovered a purple-line sea goddess nudibranch finishing a line of poetry Wednesday afternoon during a shore dive on Blacktip Island’s Sailfish Reef. (photo courtesy of Steve Childs)

Blacktip Island scuba divers on an afternoon shore dive Wednesday discovered signs the island’s sea goddess nudibranchs may spell words in the sand with their slime trails.

“There was a film of algae on the sand, the light was just right and I could make out a cursive ‘N,’” Emma Dorris said. “I looked closer and there was ‘Nantucket’ spelled out in a flowing, 19th Century script. And at the end of the ‘t’ there was a tiny yellow-and-purple sea slug.

“You could see traces of other words, but divers had kicked too much sand to read them,” Dorris said. “Nudibranchs could be doing this all over the place but no one ever noticed, what with divers and storms stirring up the sand. But the weather’s been good and the sand was undisturbed.”

Longtime local divers were not surprised.

“There’s been stories for years of divers seeing words on the sand,” Rusty Goby said. “‘Pruitt’ and ‘trucker,’ most often. We always passed that off, but now it all makes sense. Near as we can tell, those little suckers get of on writing bawdy limericks.”

The scientific community said more study is needed.

“Assuming these slugs do leave words in their wake, is it something they do by happenstance or is it a conscious act?” Tiperon University-Blacktip marine biology professor Ernesto Mojarra said. “Is it only one species? Do they all slime in the same script? Indications are the gold-line sea goddesses have the best penmanship, while the tasseled nudis’ slime is damn-near illegible, but it’s early yet.

“We’re building big Plexiglas cubes to lower over nudibranchs to protect the sand writing from surge and current and divers,” Mojarra said. “And we have teams scouring the reef looking for all species of nudibranchs. That’s the real hard work.”

Some on the island scoffed at the idea of sea slugs writing poetry.

“Limericks? Not haiku or Italian sonnets?” said Chrissy Graysby. “And they only write in English? This is another crop-circle hoax.

“Ernie and his gang’re piling on as an excuse to get grant money,” Graysby added. “And free diving under the guise of ‘research.’”

Mojarra was unfazed by the criticism.

“This could be the cross-discipline breakthrough of our generation,” he said. “The engineering department worked up some underwater blacklights that really make the letters pop.

“We’re also teaming up with the English department to study how and why these slugs acquired their literary preferences,” Mojarra said. “They’ve done studies that indicate lettuce sea slugs compulsively slime-write the text of T.S. Eliot’s ‘The Wasteland.’ Or as much of it as they can before something eats them.”

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February 23, 2018 · 8:23 am

New Blacktip Island Certifying Agency To Train Bad Divers

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DADI scuba instructor Casey Piper teaches a student to kick coral Thursday at Blacktip Island’s Hammerhead Reef. The new training agency is dedicated to training students to dive as poorly as possible. (photo courtesy of Alexdiver)

A group of Blacktip Island scuba instructors has formed a new certifying agency focused on training scuba students to dive badly, the group announced Friday.

“Most guests dive like they’ve disconnected their brains,” said Eagle Ray Divers instructor Casey Piper. “They don’t check their air pressure before jumping in, they kick the coral, they crowd the boarding ladders. We thought, ‘if they’re going to dive badly, they should do it well.’”

“The agency’s Dumb Ass Dive Instructors,” Piper said. “Our motto is ‘Deep Down, You Want To Be A Dumbass.’ Basic open water’s a three-day course. It can take less time, obviously, but agency standards call for a full three days.”

Industry professionals hailed the agency.

“It’s brilliant,” said Eagle Ray Divers operations manager Ger Latner. “If you’re going to dive poorly, don’t half-ass it. Casey’s people are training guests to dive overweighted, to ignore their buddies and to use zero navigation skills.

“DADI divers are required to frog-hop in without a glance at their gauges,” Latner said. “And they’re warned never to read their dive computer’s instruction manual. Or look at the computer during a dive.”

Resort owners said the agency has been a boon to business.

“If we can’t stop guests from diving like yahoos, we can at least make money off it,” said Eagle Ray Cove owner Rich Skerritt. “With DADI, they’re taught to have as much crap as possible dangling off their BCs. Every D-ring chock-a-block full of crap. Then we sell them all the crap.

“The Harassing Wildlife module’s super popular,” Skerritt said. “We’re teaching folks how to properly chase a stingray, turtle or shark. Then we sell them cameras, and give prizes for blurry photos of the critters’ butts.”

Local dive staff were unimpressed.

“We don’t really see any difference,” Eagle Ray Divers divemaster Alison Diesel said. “It’s job security for us, I guess, keeping them alive.”

Students raved about the course.

“I always felt so guilty not doing everything they told me to do in my open water class,” Suzy Souccup said. “The Dumbass class was liberating. It simplifies diving and lets me just having fun, guilt free.”

“I mean, instead of figuring out my profile, or listening to a boring briefing, I can just hop in with everyone else, then come up with everyone else,” she added.

DADI officials stressed the class doesn’t neglect safety.

“We require all Dumbass-certified divers to carry dive accident insurance,” Piper said. “It gives them, and us, peace of mind. If nothing else, we accomplished that.”

DADI plans to add more Dumbass courses in the future.

“We have plans for an Advanced Dumbass Diving course, and lots of Dumbass specialties,” Piper said. “We were going to do a Dumbass Rescue course, but didn’t really see the point.

“We’re training all our staff to teach the course, too,” Piper said. “We’ll all be proud to say we’re Dumbass instructors.”

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February 9, 2018 · 8:16 am

Trained Groupers To Patrol Blacktip Island’s Coast

grouper intel

A Nassau grouper stands guard on Blacktip Island’s Pinnacle Reef Thursday. A plan by the Tiperon Islands Defense Enterprise would surround the island with specially-trained grouper to warn of any impending invasion. (photo courtesy of lowjumpingfrog)

Following last week’s news that a Blacktip Island divemaster had trained a Nassau grouper to add and subtract, the Tiperon Islands Defense Enterprise announced Thursday it plans to train grouper to help guard the Tiperons from possible foreign attacks.

“If this grouper thing checks out, and I think it will, we could have the makings of a offshore early warning system,” TIDE head MacArthur Wrasse said. “They’ll be our eyes and ears on the reef, able to tell us how many bad guys are coming and from what direction.

“We’re calling it our ‘Grouper Wall,’” Wrasse said. “First order of business is getting this Hoase fellow a security clearance. We’ll need clearances for the fish, too, pronto, so we can get the defense system operational asap.”

Grouper training for all the islands will take place on Blacktip, officials said.

“Blacktip’s isolation’ll help keep the training details as under wraps as possible,” TIDE deputy chief Harry Blenny said. “Blacktip’s small, slow-paced and backwards, like most of its residents. Any off-islanders show up and start poking around, we’ll know straight away.”

Island officials welcomed the news.

“We’ll all sleep a little sounder knowing there’s someone on guard,” said island mayor Jack Cobia. “Security on that scale has been sadly lacking for a long time, what with there being no standing military in the Tiperons.

“On Blacktip all we have is the island constable and a volunteer defense force that does occasional patrols, but that’s about it,” Cobia said. “Frankly, the Blacktip Force for Defense is more of an excuse to hang out and drink beer. Groupers don’t drink. That’s a plus right there.”

Not all residents were happy with the idea.

“They’re talking about weaponizing fish. In a marine park,” Blacktip People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals president Harry Pickett said. “Plus, there’s a 2,000-foot wall that drops off 100 yards offshore. How much early warning will the groupers actually give? It’s more like telling us who’s at the door.

“Bigger picture, the program’s a blatant scam for government funding,” Pickett said. “Who, exactly, is going to attack us? There’ve been zero invasions in the island’s history. Unless you count tourists.”

BFD officials called that attitude naïve.

“It only takes one time, you know,” said Antonio Fletcher, BFD sergeant-at-arms. “Not many enemies now, sure, but you can’t be too careful. Cuba’s close by. And Belize. Things change. And The Sight can’t pick up everything.”

“Groupers watching the coast makes good sense – they know the sea better than any of us,” Fletcher said. “Plus, they’re naturally suspicious. They know when something’s fishy or doesn’t smell right.”

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February 2, 2018 · 10:32 am

Blacktip Island Divemaster Trains Grouper To Do Math

math grouper

Eagle Ray Divers guest Juanita Cerf poses an arithmetic question to Bernie the Nassau grouper on Blacktip Island’s Hammerhead Reef Thursday. (photo courtesy of Grady Cerf)

A Blacktip Island divemaster has taught a Nassau grouper to do basic arithmetic to entertain dive guests, the Caribbean island’s Eagle Ray Cove resort announced Wednesday.

“Gage Hoase’d been messing with that grouper at Hammerhead Reef for ages. Bernie, the one who likes to be petted,” Eagle Ray Divers operations manager Ger Latner said. “We had no idea what Gage was up to until he had the fish add and subtract for guests during a dive.

“Nassaus are smart, on the fish scale, but this blew us away,” Latner said. “Divers can ask Bernie math questions, and the damn fish’ll answer back. Correctly. Our boats are packed, and we’re diving Hammerhead two, three times a day.”

Hoase said Bernie’s skill came about by chance.

“He’s a friendly fish, always interested in what I was doing,” he said. “One day I was counting divers on my fingers and I noticed him bobbing his head in time with my counting.

“I held up four fingers on each hand and he nodded eight times,” Hoase said. “From there it was a natural jump to writing math problems for him on an underwater slate.”

Dive guests raved about their encounters.

“I asked Bernie what seven plus nine was and that little dickens answered right!” said Eagle Ray Cove guest Kenny Bloate. “He bobs his head for single digits and shakes it side-to-side for larger numbers: one shake and six nods equaled 16! They charge extra for the dive, but it’s worth it.”

Other divers were skeptical at first.

“I thought it was BS, then I put Bernie through his paces,” Juanita Cerf said. “I even gave him a problem with a negative number as the answer and he turned 180 degrees and counted it right out.”

The island’s scientific community remains dubious.

“We dived Hammerhead Reef without any Eagle Ray Dive staff present and found the fish to be curious, but otherwise untalented,” Tiperon University-Blacktip marine biology chair Goby Graysby said. “Our working hypothesis is Mr. Hoase is signaling to the fish.

“That’s not to say Gage’s work isn’t impressive,” Graysby added. “To train a grouper to respond to signals is unusual. But the fish can’t perform arithmetic.”

Hoase rebuffed Graysby’s claim.

“It’s a game for Bernie. If he doesn’t like you, he won’t play,” Hoase said. “And fish learning is more common that you think. A woman on Barbados taught a parrotfish to tell time. And a humphead wrasse in Palau can spell. In Latin and Cryrillic scripts. It’s working on kanji characters, too, but so far is only up to emojis.

“The next step for Bernie is quadratic equations,” Hoase said. “He understands them, but we haven’t worked out a system for him to communicate anything like ‘x=y+2’. It’ll probably involve barrel sponges.”

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December 22, 2017 · 8:47 am

Undersea ‘Christmas Carol’ Brightens Blacktip Island Holiday Season

underwater xmas carol

The cast of the underwater ‘Christmas Carol’ run through the final scene at Bob Cratchit’s house during the dress rehearsal Wednesday afternoon. (photo courtesy of Mahdian)

Dive staff from Blacktip Island scuba resorts have joined forces to stage an underwater version of Charles Dickens’ classic A Christmas Carol in the shallows off the Diddley’s Landing public pier. The play will be performed twice daily through Christmas Eve.

“We wanted a fresh take on an old classic,” artistic director Cori Anders said. “The dialogue’s 100% scuba signals, with some new ones we got from the local Mime Divers Association.

“Each actor gives surprising nuance to the hand signs – is that ‘eel’ sign fast, slow, over-the-top, understated? Small inflections carry a ton of weight,” Anders said. “After the ghost of Christmas Yet To Come leaves, Scrooge’s desperate out of air sign had the crew in tears.”

The cast includes:

  • Elena Havens as Ebenezer Scrooge
  • Gage Hoase as Bob Cratchit
  • Marina DeLow as the Ghost of Christmas Past
  • Alison Diesel as the Ghost of Christmas Present
  • Wendy Beaufort as the Ghost of Christmas Yet To Come
  • Hugh Calloway as Tiny Tim
  • Lee Helm as the Christmas Turkey
  • Finn Kiick as Old Fezziwig

“We didn’t really need the Old Fezziwig character, but it’s just fun to say and lightened the rehearsals,” Anders said.

The underwater venue allows for creative staging.

“Scrooge clomps across the sand in lead boots, while neutrally-buoyant ghosts float over and around him,” said Blacktip Haven resort owner Elena Havens. “And when the inevitable sting ray cruises past, it gives an ethereal quality to the performance.

“The audience is on scuba and can view the play from any angle, so long as they don’t interfere with the actors,” Havens said. “And we have morning and afternoon shows to give all divers a chance to see it.”

Some of the staging had to be curtailed for safety’s sake.

“We tried a night dive version, but the audience got mixed in with the actors and it turned into a real Charlie Foxtrot,” said cast member Gage Hoase. “Things blew up when the Ghost of Christmas Yet To Come scared the bejesus out of a couple from Cincinnati. They bolted to the surface. But, man, did they tip well at the end of the week.”

The play is not without its critics.

“You have to be 10 years old to scuba dive, which means the younger kiddos can’t see it,” local parent Ginger Bass said. “And the sign language is a mostly gibberish. I mean, I know the story and I had a hard time following along. I think they make it up as they go along, and there were some rude gestures mixed in that are definitely not scuba signals.”

Performances are at 10:30 and 2:45 daily. Proceeds of the play go to The Blacktip Island Widows and Orphans Fund, minus expenses and incidentals.

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November 24, 2017 · 8:52 am

Blacktip Island Native To Pen Weekly Advice Column

ask dermott
The Blacktip Times will feature a new weekly advice column in its Lifestyles section.

In response to a growing number of letters to the editor sent to The Blacktip Times regarding lifestyle questions, the paper’s editor-in-chief announced Wednesday the creation of ‘Ask Dermott,’ a man-on-the-street oriented advice column.

“Dermott Bottoms is one of the few people born on Blacktip Island. He’s lived his whole life here,” editor Samson Post said. “He’s uniquely qualified to offer insight into how to live happily and peacefully on this little rock.

“His advice is succinct and to the point,” Post said. “Dermott will be a great addition to the Blacktip Times team.”

Bottoms said the move was a no-brainer.

“Offer advice at the Sand Spit every evening, might as well get paid for it,” he said.

The Times is offering a sample of the new column prior to its official release:

Dear Dermott,

When I’m drinking tea, should I hold my pinkie out, or is that a pretentious holdover from the old days? – Tea Bone

Dear Tea Bone,

‘Pinkie?’ Ought to have your butt kicked just for that. Drink beer. Do whatever you want with your fingers.

**

Yo, Dermott,

I was out for a day of fishing when my outboard died. I got out and swam the skiff back to shore. When I got home, I found my wife in bed with our neighbor. She was wearing a Batman hood and cape. He was wearing a Hello Kitty mask. What should I do? – All Wet

Dear Wet,

Check your fuel can for water, your fuel line for clogs and maybe clean the air filter.

**

Hey, Dermott,

Every time I give a dive briefing, Bananarama’s ‘Cruel Summer’ plays from my dental fillings. Guests are spooked. Am I out of a job? – Music Man

Dear Music,

Tell them it used to be show tunes, so it could be worse.

**

Dermott,

Two people asked me to the same Christmas party. I like them both, but for different reasons. Who should I pick? – In A Bind

Dear Bind,

Flip a coin. This is Blacktip Island – you don’t lose your partner, you just lose your turn.

**

Hi, Dermott,

This holiday season I’m searching for the perfect wine pairing for land crab. Any suggestions? – Thirsty Diner

Dear Thirsty,

Chilled Heineken accentuates the flavor of land crab without overpowering it. For whelk stew, try a warm Amstel. Or skip the food and go straight to rum.

**

OK, Dermott,

In a Dungeons and Dragons scenario where my group is trapped by a giant cave troll, should I cast a spell of invisibility and sneak away, or a spell of ogre strength and maybe save everyone? – Draggin’ Behind

Dear Draggin’,

Get the hell out of my column.

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November 3, 2017 · 7:14 am

Fisherman Discovers Sunken Pyramids Off Blacktip Island

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Antonio Fletcher’s photo of what he claims are ancient pyramids atop a remote seamount off Blacktip Island’s northwest coast. (photo courtesy of Antonio Fletcher)

Local fisherman Antonio Fletcher says he discovered underwater pyramids on a seamount off Blacktip Island’s west coast Wednesday morning while searching for a new fishing spot.

“Went out to Robber’s Bank, where folks don’t usually go,” Fletcher said. “Had my camera on a weighted line to see where the fish were and BAM! There were these big bumps on top of the bank.

“Looked to be stair-stepped. Like Mayan and Aztec pyramids. Or maybe Egyptian,” Fletcher said. “Makes sense, you know – that was high ground before sea levels rose, and Central America’s right close by.”

Local archeologists are asking fishermen and scuba divers to avoid the seamount until they can investigate Fletcher’s claim.

“This could be the find of the century, but we can’t get to it because of ripping currents the last few days,” Tiperon University-Blacktip professor Catalina Luxfer said. “There’s no known man-made structures in this part of the Caribbean, though, so it may just be a big coral head. But if it is something, we don’t want it looted.

“That seamount’s remote, but it’s not unknown. If there’s structures like that on it, I’m not sure why someone hadn’t seen them, though,” Luxfer said. “As for Mayans and Aztecs, those are two completely different civilizations separated by thousands of years. And I’m not touching the Egyptian angle.”

The island’s non-scientists are eager to explore the site as well.

“I don’t care what Catalina wants, we’re gonna drop divemasters out there once the currents die down, see exactly what we’ve got,” said Eagle Ray Cove resort owner Rich Skerritt. “If ‘Tonio’s right, this is a major find.

“We can charge guests double for diving on Mayan pyramids, and folks’ll be lined up out the door begging to pay,” Skerritt said. “Pyramid diving could make Blacktip the premier scuba destination in the western hemisphere. Catalina can study the site all she wants while our divers are there.”

Many locals are dubious about the find.

“It’s probably just a couple of big rocks. Or sleeping turtles,” fisherman Rocky Shore said. “I mean, what kind of camera does ‘Tonio have that he can just lower it down and get reliable photos? And where’d he even get a camera? He can barely afford gas for his outboard.

“End of the day, this is ‘Tonio,” Shore said. “He thinks he’s Fletcher Christian reincarnated. It’s a wonder he didn’t claim he found Atlantis.”

Fletcher remained optimistic.

“Not saying it’s Atlantis,” he said. “But it could be part of it.”

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October 27, 2017 · 7:52 am

Blacktip Island Church Demands Ban On Split Fins

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Use of paddle-style scuba fins may become mandatory on Blacktip Island dive sites if a local religious leader’s anti-split fin campaign is successful. (photo courtesy of Steve Dingledein)

The Blacktip Island scuba diving community was polarized this week by an island religious leader’s demand that split scuba fins be banned in favor of paddle-style fins.

“These cloven-hooved fins are the devil’s work, plain and simple,” said the Rev. Pierre Grunt, head of the Blacktip Island Temperance League. “They may seem innocent, but that’s how Satan fools the unwary.”

“They’re symptomatic of the evils overwhelming our island,” Grunt said. “It’s no coincidence the reefs started dying the same time these fins showed up. To save our reefs, we have to return to the paddle fins of our forefathers.”

Grunt’s claim struck a chord among some local divers.

“I never realized how bad these fins were until Rev. Grunt opened my eyes to what’s really going on,” said island resident Edwin Chub. “That was a jaw dropper, all right. I went straight out and threw my split fins away. Lots of us did. I’m not gonna be a part of something like that.”

Local scuba operators denounced the grassroots campaign.

“Pierre scares away any resort guests with this crap, I’ll split more than his fins,” Eagle Ray Cove Resort owner Rich Skerritt said. “That goes for his rants about no diving on Sundays, too. Why would the preacher care about scuba fins? Or even notice them?”

Some Blacktip residents questioned Grunt’s motives.

“The only non-coincidence is Pierre’s part-owner in Bamboo You, and sales have tanked on their bamboo paddle-style fins,” local Clete Horn said. “Last month his schtick was an alcohol ban, and that fell flat on its face.

“He’s just switched to fins, telling a bigger whopper and hoping more folks’ll buy in,” Horn said. “Big picture, Pierre wants to fill his church. And his offering plates.”

Some in the island’s religious community worry the campaign will be detrimental long term.

“We’re being demonized over these fins,” High Druid Joey Pompano said. “People are blaming us for bringing them to the island. For encouraging people to use them.

“We don’t care what fins people use, or if they don’t use fins at all,” Pompano said. “Rev. Grunt and his BITS can go to hell. Why don’t they pick on the Unitarians once in a while?”

The Rev. Grunt remains unapologetic.

“Deuteronomy 23:13 is quite clear,” he said. “ It reads, ‘Thou shalt have a paddle upon thy person . . .’ You can’t get more straightforward than that.”

Grunt declined to comment on his ties to Bamboo You. Company officials did not return several Times phone calls.

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October 20, 2017 · 7:20 am

Underwater Headphones Let Blacktip Island Divemasters Narrate Dives

underwater commentary

Eagle Ray Divers divemaster Lee Helm, in a full-face mask, narrates a dive on Blacktip Island’s Jawfish reef Thursday. The resort’s new program allows in-water divemasters to talk directly to resort guests throughout their dives. (photo courtesy of NOAA)

In an effort to stay one step ahead in the competitive world of recreational scuba, one Blacktip Island resort Monday began offering reef tours led by in-water dive guides giving running commentaries to snorkel and scuba guests outfitted with waterproof headphones.

“We kit our divers out with underwater headsets, and our divemasters have full-face masks so they can talk through the entire dive,” Eagle Ray Divers manager Ger Latner said. “Before, the best a dive guide could do was point to something and maybe write a quick note on a slate. Now our DMs can give full explanations.

“We’re the only dive op on Blacktip that offers this service,” Latner said. “All the extra gear costs, but it’s worth it.”

Resort guests guests agreed

“I never know what the divemaster’s pointing at, and I can never ask,” guest Jackie Wrasse said. “I usually just signal ‘OK’ and move on. Sometimes I think they point at nothing just to mess with me.

“With this, though, I know exactly what they’re showing me,” Wrasse said. “I had no idea there were so many things down there that’re supposed to be interesting.”

Other island dive operators were critical of the tours.

“With one or two divers it can be OK,” said Club Scuba Doo dive manager Finn Kiick. “But you get 20 divers all trying to get up close to one tiny sea slug, it turns into a real Charlie Foxtrot.

“Already, you can tell where an Eagle Ray divemaster’s been,” Kiick said. “Just look for the broken sea fans and kicked-to-hell coral. No way we’re doing that to the reef.”

Some Eagle Ray Divers staff had reservations as well.

“It’s not fair, having to talk through the entire dive,” divemaster Lee Helm said. “Some people are good at it, but I like to zone out when I lead a dive. And it’s pure hell when there’s nothing to show people, but they still expect a nonstop monologue.”

Others have embraced the narration.

“It’s great being able to explain what I’m showing and why it’s cool,” said divemaster Alison Diesel. “It’s also great the guests can’t talk back. We tried that at first. It didn’t end well.”

“It’s also fun, when a diver hand-signals a question, to answer wrong just to see the look on their face,” Diesel said. “I’m playing with doing tours in rhyme, too. I started with couplets yesterday. I’m working my way up to rap.”

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