Mood-Ring Wetsuits Wreak Havoc Among Blacktip Island Divers

Mood ring scuba gear

Local scuba equipment manufacturer Bamboo You’s line of mood ring-technology wetsuits caused altercations among some of the small Caribbean island’s diving guests. (photo courtesy of Alkivar)

Multiple physical altercations broke out among Blacktip Island scuba divers this week after a local scuba equipment manufacturer’s new mood-ring-inspired wetsuits produced disturbing results, local official said.

“We injected the thermochromic liquid crystal into neoprene as a way for divers to gauge each other’s moods,” Bamboo You owner Piers ‘Doc’ Planck said. “It was also a safety measure so dive staff could assess guests’ emotional states and head off any potential emergencies. The goal of Mood-O-Prene was to improve the dive experience.

“But, like anything good, folks found a way to ruin it,” Planck said. “Right off the bat there were fistfights as divers read way too much into the changing colors on other divers’ gear. Mood ring technology’s not an exact science. This is why we can’t have nice dive gear.”

Island dive staff said a positive situation deteriorated quickly.

“At first, it was sweet being able to spot the jittery divers,” Eagle Ray Cove divemaster Marina DeLow said. “We nipped a couple of underwater situations in the bud that morning. But on the boat, between dives, all hell broke loose. Divers who would normally’ve made nice with each other got hacked off when they saw the people they were chatting to didn’t give a damn.

“That escalated to some physical exchanges,” DeLow said. “We had to stick people onto different boats to maintain peace. It’s still touch-and-go. And the resort dining room’s a war zone.”

Diving guests were quick to weigh in.

“The suits seemed like a great idea, but they ruined our vacation Day One,” Lucille Ray said. “My husband kept pointing out stupid parrotfish, like he always does, and I’d smile and give him an ‘OK’ sign, as usual. Only with the suit, he could tell I didn’t give a damn. We surfaced early and’ve been going at it hammer and tongs ever since. There ought to be a warning on this gear.”

Other guests were involved in more serious confrontations.

“Sunday and Monday, this one guy’s suit’d turn bright purple across the crotch every time he talked to my wife,” Bill Fish said. “And he started talking to her a lot. Well, now the jerk’s got a purple eye to match his damn suit.”

Island officials are considering banning the liquid crystal suits.

“I’m all for folks having a good time diving, but I’m down at one dock or the other all day, breaking up fights and cautioning divers,” Island Police Constable Rafe Marquette said. “I don’t have the time, or jail cells, for this crap. Doc’s suits are a clear public nuisance.”

Planck, meanwhile, defended Mood-O-Prene.

“People know exactly what they’re putting on,” he said. “That’s part of the attraction. Folks just need to learn to control their emotions, is all. A few bad apples have spoiled things for everyone else.”

In a related story, the Eagle Ray Cove resort gift shop has cancelled its order for Bamboo You’s mood-ring clothing line.

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