Tag Archives: humor
Blacktip Island Weather
Sunday, May 9, 2021
Temperature: 83
Humidity 62%
Precipitation – Not happening
Filed under best scuba diving novels, Caribbean, Scuba Diving
Group Seeks Diving Ban On Blacktip Island Dive Site
An Eagle Ray Divers dive boat sits moored on the Loggerhead Hole dive site Thursday afternoon. A group of Blacktip Island residents has asked the site be closed to scuba divers. (photo courtesy of Cori Anders)
A group of Blacktip Island residents claiming native-American descent called this week for an immediate ban on all scuba and snorkeling on a dive site group members say is sacred ground.
“The Loggerhead Hole dive site is the most sacred religious site on the island,” resident Cori Anders said. “Our Taíno ancestors would paddle out once a month to drop zemi sculptures in the water and commune with their forbears. Then the Baptists came and that all went to hell. That reef’s still sacred, though.
“That it’s crawling with oblivious tourists is completely disrespectful,” Anders said. “We want to start up worship again, but can’t with dive boats always there and the constant scuba bubbles. And the divers snatch up any carvings we toss in the water. We’re asking for a 100-yard no-non-native diver zone around that one mooring ball so only we can go there.”
The proposal drew immediate fire from the small Caribbean island’s scuba industry.
“They want to close one of the most popular sites on the island,” Club Scuba Doo owner Ham Pilchard said. “We stop diving Loggerhead Hole, we’ll be bombarded with complaints. All day, every day. Tripadvisor would blow up. We might as well just shut our doors, we’d be out of business that fast.
“Plus, this whole Taíno angle is bollocks,” Pilchard said. “Cori has blond hair and blue eyes. And Jack Wrasse, he was bloody well born and raised in North Wales. These are just busybodies looking for attention. And a private dive site. They can damn well go sing kumbaya somewhere else and let us dive in peace.”
Group members scoffed at that idea.
“The site is where our ancestors live,” Jack Wrasse said. “Worshipping anywhere else, we’d just be talking to the water or the trees, and chucking sculptures into the void. St. Dervil himself blessed the place when he arrived on Blacktip, and performed his first seawater-into-rum miracles there.
“It’s about preserving our heritage, not just religious services,” Wrasse said. “There’s petroglyphs down there from centuries ago. Most are covered in algae, but they’re there. The ones that haven’t been looted by divers and sold on eBay and Craigslist, anyway.”
The Island Council will meet Saturday night / Sunday morning at The Last Ballyhoo bar to discuss the matter and vote on the site’s status.
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Blacktip Island Weather
Sunday, May 2, 2021
Temperature: 82
Humidity 64%
Precipitation – Soon come
Filed under Caribbean
Burglar Leaves Money In Blacktip Island Liquor Store Break In
The note and cash left in the Blacktip Island liquor store by Wednesday night’s reverse-theft burglar, who broke in undetected to pay for rum he or she had stolen during the past few months. (photo courtesy of Peachy Bottoms)
An unidentified person broke into Blacktip Island’s liquor store Wednesday night and left more than $300 in cash and a note apologizing for past alcohol thefts, island officials said.
“Damnedest thing I ever seen,” Island Police Constable Rafe Marquette said. “Guess somebody on Blacktip has a conscience. Whoever it was knew what they were doing—there’s no fingerprints, and no forced entry.
“The note was done in letters and words cut out of magazines, but there’s no other clues who’s responsible,” Marquette said. “Frankly, even if I caught the person, I’m not sure what I’d charge them with. Breaking and entering, maybe. But they didn’t take anything or do any damage. I guess it’s up to Peachy whether she wants to pursue things.”
The occurrence stunned the store’s owner.
“White rum’s been disappearing from the shelves for a while, but I wrote that off as the price of doing business,” Peachy Bottoms said. “I’ve never had a reverse-theft before. Or even heard of such a thing. I haven’t run the numbers yet, but it looks like it covers the last two months’ rum shortages.
“Whoever it was cased the place pretty good,” Bottoms said. “They didn’t damage the door, and avoided the security cameras. Hell of a risk breaking in. I get wanting to pay me back, but I’d’ve just left the cash on top of the beer cases during normal business hours.”
The small Caribbean island’s mayor praised the act.
“We get a bad rap for being a backwater island full of scallywags,” Jack Cobia said. “But this proves there’s good people here. Sure, whoever it was stole booze in the first place, but they atoned for that. I’m focusing on the positive.”
Island residents speculated who the culprit might be.
“Judging by the grammar and spelling, it’s someone not well educated,” Chrissy Grayby said. “Of course, that could be a red herring to throw people off the track. They like white rum, too. That doesn’t narrow it down much, but it does say something about the thief. I mean, if you’re gonna steal liquor, why not steal the good stuff?”
Others said they hope the incident boosts community spirit.
“I hope others on the island will follow suit,” Helen Maples said. “More and more items have been going missing lately. Blacktip has never been like that. It’s nice to think we might be reverting to the happier days when one could leave the house unlocked when off island.
“I’ve no clue why whoever’s conscience kicked in, or why, but I’m glad it did,” she said.
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Wednesday. Dolphins. With a little help from their friends:
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Blacktip Island Weather
Sunday, April 25, 2021
Temperature: 81
Humidity 68%
Precipitation – No time soon
Filed under best scuba diving novels, Caribbean, Scuba Diving
Blacktip Island Resort To Show ‘Sea Hunt’ Underwater
A prop from the set of the 1950s classic TV series Sea Hunt. Eagle Ray Cove resort will begin showing ‘Sea Hunt’ episodes underwater this week. (photo courtesy of Peter Southwood)
A Blacktip Island resort will begin showing episodes of the 1950s scuba-themed television series ‘Sea Hunt’ this week on an underwater screen in Eagle Ray Cove to celebrate the Caribbean island’s long history of scuba diving.
“People love those campy black-and-white shows with the old-timey scuba rigs,” Eagle Ray Cove resort owner Rich Skerritt said. “We showed ‘Sea Hunt’ before, at the bar, but the results were underwhelming. Then we came up with this, where divers on scuba can watch it. It’s like a night dive, but better.
“We set up a big screen right off the end of the dock, and pipe the soundtrack through underwater speakers,” Skerritt said. “Divers can sit in the sand and watch a 20-minute show. We can’t serve popcorn down there, but we sell it on the dock before and after.”
Divers praised the move.
“It’s a mondo-cool take on an old show,” Alison Diesel said. “And it’s always good to have something different to do on this little rock. I can lie down in the sand and watch Lloyd Bridges do his thing, like when I was a kid watching with my dad.
“And the way-shallow depth and short show times mean you can chill about decompression sickness,” Diesel said. “You can also sneak down a squeeze bottle filled with your favorite adult beverage, if you’re low key about it.”
Eagle Ray Cove discouraged alcohol consumption during shows.
“We ask folks not to bring alcohol,” Eagle Ray Divers operations manager Ger Latner said. “This is Blacktip, though, so that’s asking a lot. We will have dive staff down there to surface anyone obviously drinking.”
Other divers were pleased with what they called an enhanced underwater experience.
“It’s great seeing the old Mike Nelson adventures underwater, but it’s what goes on offscreen that really makes the dive,” Payne Hanover said. “The light from the screen attracts all kind of fish. Last night we had reef sharks tearing into schools of snapper. It was awesome, watching someone wrestle a shark on film while real sharks frenzied around us. And if you sit too close to the screen, you’ll get swarmed by blood worms.”
Some residents objected to the practice.
“Underwater movies can’t be good for the fish,” Harry Pickett said. “And divers kick the hell out of the reef bad enough as it is. Now they’re gonna kill even more coral.”
Latner belayed those concerns
“Out in the lagoon, there’s no coral to kill,” he said. “And the fish actually seem to enjoy it. Or the ones that’re left, anyway.
“Our main safety concern is current and surge,” he said. “It has to be pretty calm for us to show the episodes. First trial run you couldn’t see the screen there was so much sand stirred up.
Skerritt said he hopes to expand the showings.
“If this proves popular, we’re thinking of branching out and showing ‘Flipper.’ Maybe ‘Baywatch,’ too.”
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The Blacktip Times 